Papa Ramos' big week ends badly

     On Tuesday night Sergio Ramos' other half Pilar Rubio gave birth to the couple's first son. Within 24 hours the Real Madrid centre-back had scored his fifth goal in four games to put his team ahead against Real Valladolid; leading by example, practically dragging his team forward single-handedly at times. So good was he, in fact, that it seemed he must have made a pact with Rubio to name their son after the man of the match from last night's game: The name Sergio Ramos chose for his son was...Sergio Ramos. He missed a trick there by not calling him Val Kilmer.
     Ramos was everywhere, turning up to great effect at either end of the field and everywhere in between. 'Imperious' just about covers his performance. And yet he didn't end up on the winning team. Neither did any of the opposition. In fact, the only team that really won last night wasn't even playing: Barcelona stand to gain most from Madrid failing to take this 90 minutes by the throat.

The lesser-spotted Casillas

     The man from Camas, just outside Seville, led the team like a man possessed without the need to wear the captain's armband. That particular honour fell to the man who hadn't turned out in the league for Madrid in 473 days; Iker Casillas. San Iker's last league game for los Blancos was on January 10 last year, when they beat Valencia 5-0 at the Mestalla. He's still managed 21 games this season thanks to the team's run to the final of both the Champions League and the Copa del Rey, but is only playing the remaining Liga matches in order to stay match-fit ahead of the CL final against Atlético. Still, his record isn't half bad, keeping clean sheets in 14 of those games and only conceding 9 in total. As good as that record was, it now reads 10 conceded in 22 after a headed Valladolid equaliser 5 minutes from time at Estadio Nuevo José Zorrilla.
     The orange Blancos streamed forward right from the off and looked for all the world like they'd steam straight into Valladolid, manager Ancelotti announcing before the game that his side wouldn't sit back or take things easily. However, apart from a storming first 3 minutes, that's exactly what his team did. They laboured in possession, seemingly bereft of ideas after resting several key players for a variety of reasons. The cause was not helped when Cristiano Ronaldo limped off after only 9 minutes holding the left leg he'd shown to Ancelotti in training earlier in the day. CR7 remained in the Madrid dugout in his kit 'til the end of the game, but grew increasingly frustrated at his teammates' inability to take charge of the net. Indeed, next to him Carlo Ancelotti's eyebrow jiggled more and more nervously the longer it seemed his side wouldn't find a way through a tight defensive line consisting of 6 Valladolid players at some points.

Papa Ramos celebrates his goal

     Eventually the capital team managed to break the deadlock through an ever-more reliable source - Sergio Ramos senior. The Madrid number 4 took over free kick duties from Ángel Di María after the Argentine had lofted a previous effort tamely into the stands, and curled a pearler of a set piece over the wall and past the despairing dive of Jaime. Ramos ran straight over the the bench to celebrate with Ronaldo, or perhaps to tell him that he'd just made him his free kick bitch. We can only speculate. Nonetheless, my tardiness was punished as I ran out of time before the game to stop into the bookies and place a bet on el Comanche to score first. I really should leave my bloody house earlier when Ramos is on the scoring trail, damnit..
     The goal didn't serve to spur Madrid on, unfortunately, and the longer the game went on, the deeper they sat, leaving Ancelotti's eyebrow to pace up and down the Italian's face with worry. Passing moves starting from a corner would end up all the way back on the halfway line, or even back with Casillas. Yes, I realise it's novel and fun to have San Iker back in the team, but try and win the game rather than sitting on a dodgy one goal lead for an hour! If nothing else, the result shows that teams should stay true to their principles. Madrid were built to attack, and that's what they should've kept doing.
     As Del Boy always said, and was never proved wrong; "He who dares wins". - Only counts if you say it in English though, Tottingham fans, soz. - Real Madrid were too afraid to kill the game off, and were punished for some lax defending from a corner in the 85th minute, Humberto Osorio heading majestically home past Casillas. No amount of match-practice could've helped San Iker save that header, though perhaps some more lessons on defending corners wouldn't go amiss in the capital as two defenders seemed to collide and get in each others' way.

Ancelotti's eyebrow; not amused

     Looking back on the game, Val Kilmer Papa Ramos lamented the fact his team had "settled" for the 1-0 win, and conceded the Liga challenge is now Shirley over. Ancelotti, fluttering eyebrow the only thing giving away any real emotion beneath his steely facade, claimed rather hopefully that "we controlled that game apart from the last 20 minutes. Iker Casillas had barely a save to make, in the end we tried but it proved impossible. I don't think it was down to a lack of attitude; we lacked a bit of mental energy, we conceded a goal from a set-piece and that's what kept us from winning." Xabi Alonso was more realistic, saying his team displayed neither the concentration nor the intensity to close out the game.
     As things stand, Atleti will be crowned champions if they draw their last two games; Barcelona if they win both of theirs. However, the most likely scenario is that Atleti will walk over Málaga this weekend (los Boquerones have been useless and handing out free points to the opposition for weeks now, if not months) then no doubt allow Barcelona the points needed on the final weekend to ensure Real Madrid finish third. Mark my words, the bookies will be offering short odds on this. However, Real only have themselves to blame. They could have overtaken Barcelona if they'd only had the courage of their convictions last night. And a few more Sergio Ramoses. At least there's one more in the world now, even if it may not help them this season.

     Elsewhere, the National Anti-Violence Commission has increased the fine levied against Villarreal for the Alves/banana incident by a whole EUR6,000!!! Yes, you read that right - EUR6,000! That'll learn 'em! To be fair, the Commission also recommended the banana-chucker be banned from entering stadia for a further two years. But I though Villarreal had already revoked his membership and banned him for life? I'm sure this shows they mean business when tackling racism; throw a banana at a player and not only will you be banned for life, your ashes won't be allowed inside any grounds for two years after you're brown bread.
     Down in the Segunda, the expected sale of Real Zaragoza will not be going ahead tomorrow as planned after a judge in the Codesport case ruled that any money brought in by Agapito Iglesias from the deal would be seized.

El derbi canario - #bigtings

     The biggest game in the second tier this weekend is undoubtedly the Canary Islands derby between Las Palmas and Tenerife. The pair have an intense rivalry ranked among the top 50 in the world and Saturday's game should be pretty epic, all the more so as both are in the top 6 and could yet face off again in the promotion playoffs. Juan Carlos Valerón, of Deportivo de La Coruña, Spain and Championship Manager fame who is now back at first club Las Palmas, says he "cannot wait" for the derby and is still pained by his team's 3-0 defeat earlier in the season. That was the 38-year-old's first ever derby against the eternal rivals, as the two teams were in different leagues throughout his first spell with the club. 'El Flaco' has no doubt the Estadio de Gran Canaria will be full to its 31,000 capacity and is looking forward to an insane atmosphere. This may well prove his last chance to be involved in at such a game should one of the teams go up, so he's sure to enjoy it. One player who won't be enjoying the game from the pitch is Tenerife top goal-getter Ayoze, who misses out due to suspension. He will be replaced by either Raúl Cámara or Javi Moyano, both of whom are only just returning from injury. Although los Blanquiazules have lost their last two games on the spin, Cámara says the squad has been feeding off the energy from the fans in the streets all week, and is 'bang up for it'. Or he would if he were English.
     Meanwhile, league leaders Dépor will be without midfielder Juan Carlos Real for Sunday's game against Alavés after he was injured in training by Alberto Lopo. I think the lesson there is must. be. more. careful..

Sergio Ramos  /   Val Kilmer